Date of dream: Tuesday, September 30, 2003
Level of Lucidity: N/A
Level of Cohesiveness: 
Lucid Intent? No
This dream has been viewed 4326 times.
This dream is from my nap of 9/29/03.
I seemed to be out in or near the utility room, and I located a shopping flyer like from KMart or something. Mildly interested, I glanced at the toys section and found an ad for a Scooby Doo plush toy. At first I thought it was Scooby Doo--in drag. O_o Then I realized it was not him but one of his female relatives. She appeared to be younger--a puppy, but older and bigger than Scrappy Doo--and she was sitting upright on a little roundish bed or cushion. Everything around her, and her accessories, were in red and pink. I sensed it was a Valentine's Day-themed toy. Anyway she sat up on this bed, with a big pink bow on her head, and coy, heavy-lidded eyes, though I sensed an innocence to her too; she was knowing, but it wasn't like she was supposed to be slutty or anything. In front of her sat some object--the first thing that came to my mind was music box, so maybe that's what it was--also in red and pink. Perhaps she had some candies with her. I seem to remember feathers, like a boa, so perhaps she wore one. I thought of Marilyn Monroe for some reason. O_o
I looked at the ad and noticed now that her name was Barbara Dee. She was a young cousin of Scooby's or something.
"She's cute," I murmured, and left the room to go into the dining room and show the ad to my mom. Ma was seated at the computer, though I don't remember it being on, and I don't think the lights were on either; it was dim in the room, like daytime but overcast, and seemed kind of brownish. She wasn't facing the computer, that I can recall, but sat a bit away from it, maybe facing the living room. I walked up to her and showed her the flyer picture of Barbara Dee. "Isn't she cute?"
"Oooohhhhh!" Ma exclaimed, taking the flyer and looking at it. She then reached into the paper and pulled out Barbara Dee's picture, so instead of holding a piece of torn paper she now held the stuffed toy itself. It was maybe a foot high, including the bed base, maybe a bit less. I didn't question this ability of Ma's; it made perfect sense in the dream.
"She's adorable!" Ma exclaimed, then with a neutral expression pulled down her shirt and placed the mouth of the Barbara Dee toy to her BREAST!! :O ! OMG!! My mom started to BREAST FEED Barbara Dee!! She wasn't wearing a bra, and the breast she was using--her left one--seemed rather flat; I remember her skin looked a little coarse or porous, and her...ew...nipple was brownish. >_< Ick ick ick! I caught a glimpse of her other breast and it seemed fuller and kind of saggy... It's like the Barbara Dee toy now had a little pouty mouth meant for suckling at a toy bottle, and Ma just put it to her breast with this totally neutral look like it was the most normal thing! I knew she couldn't really "feed" it, it was more a gesture to show how cute she thought the toy was, but STILL--!
I turned my head away to face the left and exclaimed, "I did NOT have to see that!" Even in the dream I was thoroughly appalled, disgusted, and embarrassed by this. EW! Ma seemed slightly amused, but it was true--I so did not have to see that!! >_<;
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Date of dream: Tuesday, September 30, 2003
Level of Lucidity: N/A
Level of Cohesiveness:
Lucid Intent? No
This dream has been viewed 4235 times.
This is a dream from several nights ago. In real life my mother has been considering going to ask if I could be put on disability due to my mental state (I have OCD, but also suffer from some undiagnosed social phobia or avoidance which inhibits my interactions with people). To do this we would have to go to Petoskey. In my dream, it was evening and getting dark outside and I sat in the living room with the lights on. Ma came into the room and said something like, "Well, we can go to Northern Lights on the seventh."
Now, I knew that by "Northern Lights," she meant the name of the agency or whatever we had to go to to apply for disability. That was the name of it, in my dream. I have no idea why it was called that. :/ By "seventh," I knew she meant the seventh of next month--which in my dream made it September 7th. So my dream was for some reason taking place in late August, not September. I seemed to have traveled a month back in time here. *shrug*
"The seventh?" I echoed, then snorted. "They would schedule it for when it's supposed to be that time of the month..." For, in real life last month, I kept track of when I started menstruating and it was close to the beginning of the month, not the end. I figured I would be on my period when we had to go to Northern Lights, and this annoyed me.
"What?" Ma paused and looked at me in puzzlement.
"The seventh," I said. "It'll probably be that time of the month for me then."
"Oh--no," she said quickly, shaking her head. "Not the seventh. The twenty-seventh." I suddenly realized I must have misheard her, as I knew she had not misspoken. "September 27th. Why? Should I reschedule it?"
"No--September 27th? That's better," I said in relief. "You don't have to reschedule it." I felt better about that, and a bit anticipatory; I assumed we would go to Northern Lights and I would have to speak with a psychiatrist who would examine my mental state and decide whether I was a candidate for disability or not. I was more excited by the prospect of being able to speak with a psychiatrist than by anything else; truthfully, in real life I wish this is the way it worked as I would so love to see a shrink again! Though also in real life I am 99% certain it will be just bothersome paperwork to fill out, we won't have the proper info, and I won't qualify anyway because "shyness" is not an adequate complaint for disability pay. :(
The reason why I take note of such a mundane dream? It's because of the amount of detail there was; even now I remember the basic conversation we had, as well as the specific details of "Northern Lights," the dates of the seventh and twenty-seventh, and what month the appointment was in, September, which was next month (even though in real life that's this month and by the time I had this dream September 7th had already passed). I just found it odd how I could remember such specific details when normally I can't; and I still wonder why the name of the financial aid agency was "Northern Lights." Significance? :/
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Date of dream: Tuesday, September 30, 2003
Level of Lucidity: N/A
Level of Cohesiveness:
Lucid Intent? No
This dream has been viewed 4282 times.
This dream is from my nap of 9/29/03.
I can't remember how it started, but I seemed to be at somebody's house; maybe it was supposed to be mine, but it looked completely different. I feel it was set way out in the woods though not so it was dark all around us; it was overcast outside, with this white light shining down through the trees(?). I never set foot outside though so I can't be sure; I think I merely glimpsed it through the windows. For some reason the house made me think of my Aunt Carol's house, though in layout it did not resemble it in the least. *shrug*
I went wandering toward a back part of it and encountered a closet-type thing. It wasn't like a normal closet with a door and a space you can walk into. In fact I don't even remember a door. I just know there was this space set into the wall in the left corner and there was a shelf high up above my head. I didn't pay attention to what was on my level, lower in the closet, at first; it was the high shelf that caught my attention. There was just a piece of cheap wood forming the shelf, maybe painted offwhite or yellowish/cream; above this was a small space, maybe a couple of feet high and a few feet wide. There was a window inside this small space too, letting in soft white or yellowish light so the little top shelf was unusually well lit. I think part of the wall or front of the closet projected downwards in front of this shelf area, so while there may have been a couple of feet of space up and down in it, the space through which one could reach it--to squeeze through into it--was only several inches wide.
I stared up at this shelf area and now had the desire to crawl up into it and use it as a personal hiding space. I've always wanted a hiding space of my own in real life, in this house, but that is for personal items, not hiding myself! I think this might have been influenced by real life actually as a long time ago, while my mom was poking around in the bathroom closet, she pushed up on the tile at the top and it popped open and a GUN fell out! I screamed, but it turned out it was only a cap gun she had hidden from my brother in a space up above the closet and had forgotten about years ago! I had never even known we'd had a hiding space, and it made me jealous for one of my own. Well, in this dream, the hiding space was the top shelf of the closet ITSELF, and what I wanted to hide was ME.
"I bet I could fit up there," I mused, even though it would be a VERY tight, uncomfortable fit; I would only be able to crouch in an almost fetal position. But it would be so cool! A tiny little room with a window and all--maybe I could even crawl out the window to escape the house (though in real life, based on the size of this little narrow rectangular window, and my weight and width, it would be impossible :( ). I don't know why I really wanted to go up there, but I did.
I looked now at the SPACE allowed to squeeze into this area, and sighed. "If that weren't so narrow," I continued, as it was only a few inches between the shelf and the overhang. I began to wonder if there was ANOTHER way to reach the shelf...only now it's like I was trying to reach the "other side" of the closet, as I knew there was something concealed behind it. Like a whole hidden room, or something. Maybe the little shelf was just a part of it, or a way into it. I had to find another way I could actually fit through.
So I returned my attention to the lower part of the closet...which now was no longer really a closet, but a window in the wall. It was partly open, and styled like one of my own windows; I had opened it earlier, maybe while trying to get at the upper shelf. The wall was all gray and I pulled the window open further; behind it I could see what looked to be another room or a hall all in gray as well, like a storage area. I may have moved some junk out of the way first. I had something like a broomstick with me, and I stood back and poked this through the window, waving it around; I was trying to dispel any cobwebs that might be dangling in the area, as I didn't want to get dirty. (There was a lot of effort involved in this whole part of the dream, as if opening and clearing the window were difficult or strenuous.) I don't recall seeing any cobwebs though, so I pulled the stick back in and then put my hands on the windowsill and pulled myself through to the other side. YES!
I ended up in an odd medium to light gray hallway. It turned away at both ends and I suddenly realized that this hall surrounded the ENTIRE house, and was concealed from the inside behind the walls. (It was never explained how it couldn't be viewed or noticed from outside; even though logic dictates it would have been, I knew that it wasn't.) It wasn't a hidden room--it was a hidden HALLWAY! :D Coolness! It was meant to be like a storage area or something, but had gone mostly unused although I do know there were various items sitting along its walls--utilitarian things, like brooms and glass and such, I can't remember what specifically. What's more, it was not dark, but well lit by windows which lined its outer walls, looking out over the woods(?) and letting in that overcast white light. There were lots of these windows, all lined up, so I had a good view of outside and could easily see around myself. The hidden hallway was dusty and old like a basement, but so enticing and intriguing! I had a sudden desire now to DANCE around this hallway in my spare time--I would make it my own personal space in which I could do whatever I wanted! I could even listen to my music in here and dance around in broad daylight and nobody would see me! Well, maybe they would HEAR me, and I think my mom (or some important female figure in the dream) knew of its existence, so it wasn't ENTIRELY private, but still...
I abandoned the dancing idea, but was determined to explore this new and fascinating area. I may have left to tell somebody or speak with somebody; I feel my mom was in the dream, and maybe some other woman/women, maybe aunts of mine, like Carol or Rose or Theresa; as I said, I felt the house was meant to be ours, but it also felt kind of like somebody else's. I didn't get to check out the hall in any more depth, however. *sigh*
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