The Story Behind Dream Journal

I haven't formerly introduced myself. My name is Kelly Matthews, I go by webdiva here on this site, and this is my story.

Long long ago (age 14) on a couch in Cincinnati I took a nap. I found myself paralyzed, unable to move, and found it very difficult to breathe. I heard 2 ladies in the room talking, someone in high heels kept walking by me, and was able to see the room but it was fuzzy. I knew that I was caught between some sleep wake state but was definitely a bit freaked out, especially once I tried to talk and could not. Finally I woke up, surprised to find that I was alone in the house. So who did I hear talking? Who was it that walked by?

For the next 4 years I had these experiences nightly, sometimes 3-4 times a night. I was completely sleep deprived through high school and the experiences were more often than not, extremely terrifying. The hardest part for me was being unable to breath, I was over taken by fear each and every time and on top of it there was always what appeared to be a dark presence in the room.

Since there was no internet back then, I didn't have the luxury of looking it up online. I told no one about my experiences. Once I went to college they diminished to maybe once a week and then finally about once a month. When I turned 28 I had heard about lucid dreaming and started doing some research. Upon researching I ran across an article on "sleep paralysis". I almost wanted to cry, I was reading about what I had been experiencing for 14 years. I read the reason behind it "feeling" like I couldn't breath, and how it usually happens when you fall asleep on your back, which I always did. For me sleep paralysis always took hold immediately upon going to sleep vs waking up, as it does for many.

With this new found knowledge I was excited to experience it again and see if I could remind myself that I could in fact breathe. Ultimately I wanted to get past the fear to see if there was more to the experience. So later that week I had an episode and I reminded myself "You can breath, calm down" and eventually my breathing slowed and I was calm in this state. The "entity" was there but I no longer felt threatened. So I wonder if I brought that fear and darkness on myself. I asked the entity, in my mind, to walk over to my bed. It did. I asked it to touch my leg, I felt a hand on my leg and immediately freaked out and woke myself up.

I was ecstatic! I felt completely liberated and couldn't wait to see what else could happen. Over the next few years I used the episodes as a launching pad for both out of body experiences and lucid dreams. I even got to a point where I could fall asleep without losing consciousness. The first time that occurred I thought I was dying, but then realized I just witnessed myself fall asleep. It was as if everything changed frequency, sound, light etc. I opened up my "eyes" and could see myself from my first person point of view. Basically I was still in my body and just laying on the bed looking down towards my feet. I saw this beautiful green light pouring out of my chest. I knew what chakras were by name, but didn't know anything about the colors, locations etc. I felt open and full of peace and love. I woke myself up and immediately googled charkas to find that the heart chakra was indeed green.

Another time I feel asleep without losing consciousness, I sat up, in what I am assuming was my energy body and I could see the entire loft that I was in. Everything in the loft had an aura around it, it was amazing. I was seeing beyond what I could see in the physical. This of course was just the beginning of not only my dream exploration, but my spiritual awakening. I had always a been seeker of truth and always will be but these experiences (along with some others) were enough to confirm to me I was on the right path.

In the process of finding out about lucid dreaming when I was 28, I decided to build a website. See, I'm a web developer. I've been programming for almost 20 years now. I specialize in building interactive database driven websites. So I decided why not create a site where people can record their dreams, plus it would be a great way for me to hone my skills. So in 2001 I created the first online dream journal http://www.dreamjournal.net 
It has had several inceptions, we've collected data on over 200,000 dreams to date and we have some awesome plans for the years to come.

 

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